When most of us think of talking to a mirror, we usually think of the story of Snow White where the Queen would say, “Mirror, Mirror, on the wall…”, and well, you know the rest, but that’s not what I’m referring to. This is a technique that I learned about and even though it may sound unusual, there have been many people that have greatly benefited from this practice.
It’s really nothing new, public speakers, actors and performers, business owners and CEO’s, have all used the mirror at times to practice how they were going to present a speech, share an idea, perform a song or become a character. However, mirror talk is a bit different of a technique than this.
Now many of us have looked in the mirror and talked to ourselves at times, but we usually aren’t speaking positive words when we do. We usually are reminding ourselves of the mistakes we’ve made at work, how we’ve hurt a loved one, or how we’ve failed our family. Then we might even follow the reminders with calling ourselves bad, demeaning, hurtful, names. This is never healthy for us.
So then just what is Mirror Talk?
It is basically speaking encouraging and affirming words to ourselves.
We know how to do this with our family or friends because we are used to encouraging and affirming them. We look them right in their eyes and let them know how special they are and that they can do what they are trying to do. We encourage them to help them realize how special, how talented, how strong, how smart, or how valuable they really are. So we know how, we just need to change the who.
The technique to mirror talk goes like this. We stand in front of the mirror, we look at ourselves directly into our own eyes, and we start speaking words such as, ‘You can do it’, ‘You are capable’, You are very smart’, ‘You are loved’. We are now speaking encouragement and positive affirmations to ourselves. It may feel unusual at first, but the more you do this, you will soon notice the better you start to feel. You will begin to have a more positive outlook and more confidence in yourself.
The main key to this is looking directly into our own eyes with the emotional intensity of love and joy and believing what we say, just as we would our family or friends. Now after saying the phrases ‘You are…’ for about a week, change the phrases to ‘I am…” or ‘I can…”. Such as ‘I can do it’, ‘I am capable’, ‘I am very smart’, ‘I am loved’. There is no limit to the phrases we can speak to ourselves using this technique.
We can even do this regarding our dreams. For example, if someone always wanted to be an author, write books, and have them published, that person might start the first week with ‘You are an accomplished author’ or even say ‘You are a published and successful author’. Then the next week that person would change the ‘You are…’ to ‘I am…’, and say ‘I am an accomplished author’, or ‘I am a published and successful author’.
Henry Ford said, “If you think you can do a thing or think you can’t do a thing, you’re right”. So instead of speaking negatively to ourselves in the mirror, as we all have often done, let’s make a conscious change and speak in a positive and loving way to ourselves and believe in our dreams again.
One of the best examples of all this that I know of is Muhammad Ali. He was always speaking encouraging and positive affirmations until he became what he spoke. He would always say, “I am the greatest”, and he believed it so much that he did become the greatest heavyweight champion in boxing, just as he had dreamed of becoming.
As we put this technique into practice, our whole mindset about ourselves change. We start having more confidence and believing in ourselves again, that our decisions we make and actions we take, start to line up with what we are speaking. We start making choices and taking steps towards fulfilling our dreams. Then before we realize it, our dreams become reality.
This mirror talk technique has been tested and proven as you can see in these resources attached here. 1)Article “Compassion At The Mirror” by Nicola Petrocchi, Cristina Ottaviani, Alessandro Couyoumdjian 2)“Mirror Work” by Louise Hayes
So, test this for yourself. Speak encouraging and positive affirming words to yourself. You’ll be surprised, just as I was, how effective this technique can be.